|Animated Han Solo, making the intergalactic symbol for utter failure.|
The Star Wars Holiday Special. Perhaps you've heard of it.
Carrie Fisher plays it at parties when she wants people to leave.
George Lucas said that if he had the time and a hammer, he would track down and smash every single copy of it (and The Phantom Menace showed us all how low his standards are)
And it was named the worst two hours in the history of television.
I had heard the stories, sure. I had read about the coveted bootlegs out there for the intrepid to find and endure. But nothing could prepare me for how awful it really is, and how unimaginable the self-discipline to finish it would prove. But finish it I did, so I could bring you this microreview.
|Wookie Holiday Card|
The one - well, "redeeming" would be far too generous a word - mildly diverting feature of the Holiday Special is the introduction of Boba Fett, who makes his first appearance in the series by way of an animated segment that really isn't that bad compared to what's around it.
Objective Quality: 2/10
Bonuses: +1 for Boba Fett's introduction; +1 for the amazing vintage commercials in most of the bootlegged versions; +1 for its legendary cult status
Penalties: -1 for every musical interlude, including those by Diahann Carroll, Jefferson Starship, and Princess Leia; -1 for, as Wikipedia calls it, the "comedy" from Harvey Korman, and -1 for the 10-minute, non-subtitled introduction spoken entirely in Wookiee.
|Leia singing. You can't tell from his expression, but 3PO is dying a little inside at this very moment.|