Friday, December 21, 2012

2012 Nerd Gift Guide: Jemmy

1. Show 'em You're the Ultimate GRRM Fan: For Nerds Who Take GRRM too Seriously

So, you think you are the world's greatest George R.R. Martin fan? You've read all the books, you've seen the HBO series; heck, you've even bought the awesome Hodor T-shirt from the HBO website. Let me tell you, you are still not a Song of Ice and Fire nerd. Simple consumerism is not enough. You need to start down the path of Song of Ice and Fire obsession. To get this distinguished honor, you need to expand your horizons. It is time to start painting your own Song of Ice and Fire miniatures. Available at Dark Sword Miniatures, each character miniature runs from around $10 to $25, and is a perfect gift to show your true and unadulterated obsession.  

And don't worry if miniatures are not enough to float your boat. You can still exercise your nerdish obsession in other ways. Why not also buy replicas of Longclaw, Needle, King Robert's Warhammer, and the various fine examples of Valyrian steel, at the Valyrian Steel online shop? Let's truly bring Westeros home!

[King Robert's Warhammer on the left; Longclaw on the right]

2. The Ultimate Back to the Future Gear

A few days ago, Vance suggested getting a model dusty Delorean. I suggest we up the ante. Do you remember in Back to the Future II, when Marty McFly travels to the year 2015 to stop his son from getting involved with Biff's grandson? Yeah? Do you remember how cool the future looked? Well, you can wear the future fashion (even before 2015) by buying this cool, reflective Marty McFly hat at Think Geek. For the low price of $19.99, you can sport the Marty McFly retro future look! It even has velcro: how futuristic!

Now hold your horses. I know you don't want to stop at just buying a Marty McFly hat. You can show off your inner nerd by buying a hoverboard as well. Go over to Matty Collector and shell out $120 for this beauty. Just don't expect the hoverboard to actually hover...

3. Politically Incorrect Games: Cards Against Humanity

A new party game for horrible people, Cards Against Humanity lets you and your friends throw political correctness out the window. Literally. It can be as despicable and awkward as you and your friends are. In the process, Cards Against Humanity is uncontrollably funny. This game is Apples to Apples on crack, or as the Onion Av Club states, "a sort of Apples to Apples for the cross and jaded." Once you start, you won't be able to stop. You'll have a group of cards that will make you laugh or make you wince, possibly both at the same time! It is available for free via download, or for the low price of $25 at Cards Against Humanity.

With any of these three nerd-gift ideas, you'll be too cool for school; too nerd for... word.