Film Review: Predator: Killer of Killers

 All Killer, No Filler

Predator is one of my favorite franchises out there, possibly even rivalling my rabid Star Wars fandom. One of the things I love about the growing Predi-verse is that it is simply unapologetically what it is. The first two are tight, tense affairs, with a few hints at a larger universe and timeline. The years that followed brought some fun comics and video games, before the tepid AVP movie threatened to derail the whole endeavor. Then came the vastly underrated Predators, then Prey, and now the lid is off with Killer of Killers. It doesn't concern itself with silly frivolities like a super deep story, historical accuracy, subtlety or nuance. It gives us what we came for - scenery chewing hunters, wrecking everything around them and slaughtering redshirts in brutal and hilarious ways. 

Split into three(ish) parts, across the Viking era, feudal Japan and WWII in the Pacific, a different Predator (the species we now know to be called 'Yautja'), with different weapons, takes on a different warrior from each timeline. The extremely simple review is: It's really good. Like I said - it's exactly what it is. Each Yautja is unique, with badass weapons that slaughter everyone except their target in creative ways. Each target is likewise unique, a badass (with Torres, the American, playing a little too much into the aw-shucks-underdog American fantasy a little too much), that overcomes their pursuer with ingenuity and determination.

Thank god I'm safe, unless there is a drinking-game-driven Predator

This exposes the inherent flaw in the Predi-verse: They are presented as the ultimate hunter, killer of killers, etc, and yet... they always lose. Sure, they kill the NPCs with reckless abandon, but the main character always wins in the end, and sure, we see those people get picked up by squads of Predators, but the title card fight always ends with the humans on top. It was one of the things that drove me nuts about AVP - the tagline was "whoever wins, we lose", and yet, humans were the ones standing at the end. 

Perhaps the upcoming Badlands fixes this, but at a certain point, it takes the punch out of Predators treating Earth like a hunting preserve, but getting their asses kicked every time (that we see). To be honest - it's a fairly small complaint, and each one of the movies, including this one, is extremely entertaining in its own right. But like so many other cinematic universes, as it grows, it opens itself up to more and more scrutiny, especially of its own in-universe rules and composition. 

All that being said, since Disney owns the rights to Predator and nearly every other IP in the known universe, and we are clearly trying to visit every era of human history with Predators, I am available to write any of the following movies for a modest fee:

• Predator vs Stitch - Stitch is ultimately accepted by the Yautja as one of their own; Lilo disembowels her bullying classmates. Post-credit scene teases Predator vs Toothless.
• Predator vs Terminator - Dutch is brought out of stasis to fight the OG terminator; this confuses the Yautja greatly.
• Predator vs the Sith - just two hours of lightsabers and Yautja weapons
• Predor vs Ewoks - Just two hours of Predators slaughtering Ewoks
• Predator in the era of the Aztecs. Two movies - in the first, a Predator defeats an Aztec warrior, immediately before the Spanish arrive. Post-credit scene shows them taking the Aztec gold, with the Yautja watching. They become the curse of the Aztec gold, slaughtering any who possess it for taking it dishonorably. 

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The Math

Baseline Assessment: 9/10

Bonuses: None, but worth mentioning the score above includes points for not trying to hard, and just focusing on the basics. 

Penalties: -1 for the humans winning.

Nerd Coefficient: 8/10 - well worth your time and attention
See more about our scoring system here.

-DESR